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An NLP Ice Breaker for Social Gatherings I used to find large parties or networking events daunting. I never knew how to start a conversation with a stranger. Since I’ve moved often, to different cities far away from the one I previously lived in, I usually don’t know many people at these events. I’m often ‘the new person in town’. Recently I had the opportunity to attend an exhibit opening at an art gallery. I found the NLP technique of starting a conversation with a comment about what the person is wearing an easy ice breaker for me as I love fashion and am comfortable talking about clothing. I spotted a very professional looking woman in the room, positioned myself near where she was standing for a minute or two and started a conversation with her by commenting on her purse. I recognized it to be a very expensive Chloe bag. I opened with “Hi, I really love your purse and I’m thinking of buying the smaller version of that bag. I was wondering if you could tell me where you bought it.” Her face lit up! People buy designer bags often to be associated with the high-end brand’s image over the esthetic look and functionality of the bag. She liked that I recognized the bag [because she also knew that I knew that it was expensive and, therefore, she must be a woman of means and all that implies – whether true or not]. She responded that she bought it at the new Barneys store that recently opened in town where they had a limited selection. I continued the conversation on with the follow-up question of “Are you happy with it?” which led to several more minutes of conversation. During our conversation I mirrored and matched as best I could. It helped that we both had a drink in our hands. She was kinesthetic in that she used a lot of ‘feel’ words, I peppered my dialog with kinesthetic words as well to maintain rapport. It was a great experience for me because instead of dreading parties and networking events I know look forward to them!
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